This is old..

..but the champagneok site still manages to make me lol if not rotflmao. Actually, to be specific, it makes me estmn,* but I think that's a subset of lol, so I'll stick with lol.

I think Mark Frauenfelder basically figured out the secret to this page when he said, "Interesting that someone would go to the trouble of registering champagneok.com...."

That's it exactly: If this were a ytmnd, I would have already forgotten about it,** but the fact that it has its own url makes it more.. perfecty..? Maybe..? Or maybe because registering a useless url*** seems more like Proto-web, when Carl Steadman roamed the earth and www.isitfriday.net**** seemed like about as perfectly zen an online experience as you could hope for and therefore champagneok is a callback to my younger, more innocent self?

So, anyway, this is old, and but yet so
If you need me, I'll be in the wayback machine.



* exhale sharply through my nose
** although maybe not: I just ran across this again: ESTMN!!!11!
I realize now that I did not use my Casio SK-1 to its full potential.
I suggest a new strategy. Let the Wookiee carol.
*** back when it still felt like you could find the end of the internet (black text over battleship gray tiled background of an embossed photograph), the "Useless Pages" index (exploding whale, sea monkeys, animations achieved by using the Netscape scrollbar) was basically my favorite thing in the world, obviously back before Search killed Index. Maybe that's why Miranda July's site seems so Web 1.0: because it's invisible to Search. Hm.
**** don't bother clicking; it's now just a domain-for-sale site, but in case you're wondering, it's probably not Friday.

The Pedestrian

BoingBoing had a post last week about how Stephan Orsak's tasering mirrors the Ray Bradbury story The Pedestrian.

But BoingBoing! You are being silly and misguided again! As we all know, and as Bradbury has repeatedly said, The Pedestrian was not intended to be about police intimidation and brutality, but was meant as a critique of the newly fashionable "automatic transmission".

Of course, Bradbury lost that battle; maybe his beef with television will have fared better when Future Peoples look back at all this nonsense.

Fingers crossed!


Seriously, though: Dandelion Wine was so important to me growing up that my first born son's middle name is taken from the main character.

Therefore, I think I am allowed to say: Ray Bradbury, please stop being idiotic and stupid and sucking so much and acting like such a stupid, sucking idiot.
I am serious: I will fight you if it comes to that. I don't want it to, but I will fight you. Or at least send a robot to fight you.*


* This was one of the first stories of his I ever read, and I remembered that story was called something like Usher II but I had forgotten that the full title was April 2005: Usher II.

April 2005 used to be THE FUTURE!